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Silence In The Morning.

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Ever since Spring semester started I’ve been trying to wake up earlier, fix myself a simple breakfast, and brew a cup of coffee each morning. I think it’s been good for me because it gives me time to think as I give myself up to its silence. There are things I find during this time. Sometimes, I uncover peace and other times grief is quick to greet me. To be completely honest, ever since the start of this new year I’ve been quite depressed. I like to think the number of days in a life is like the number of sand in an hourglass. Eventually, the last grain will fall as we breathe our last breath. We don’t have forever the way our delusional eyes paint for us. Thus, there has to be a sense of urgency with the way we spend our day because it is a day we’ll never get back. Therefore, my lack of productivity, and the lack of attempt to chase what I love has been excruciatingly painful for me. Unfortunately, the clock is ticking and the hours are going by. The past increases as the future recedes, and it feels like my possibilities are slipping away as regrets are collected. Perhaps I’m being dramatic? Yeah, probably. This has been on my mind for some time now. I just wish I can get myself to do something about it but strangely, I won’t. I don’t know why.

I haven’t posted in about a month and I haven’t even touched this blog since. I guess my mind has just been elsewhere lately. However, I think it’s about time I start coming back and begin posting regularly. If you guys have read to the end of this long rant, then please write a comment! How has your guys’ 2016 been so far?

Sinking, Floating, etc.

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Hello everyone! I hope all of you guys have been doing well. I know it’s been a long time since New Years. I miss interacting with all of you. I’ve been pretty stressed out this week and so this weekend I went to a museum in LA called The Broad. It was definitely refreshing for me and a good change of scenery. For those of you who live in SoCal, I would definitely recommend checking this place out for all the artsy people out there. The pictures I show does not do the place justice. I personally love museums and looking at artwork so here are a few pieces I enjoyed or found interesting. I honestly took a lot more pictures than this but I didn’t want to overwhelm you guys with too many. Hope you guys enjoy!

If you guys feel like, please leave a comment below! I’d love to know how you guys are doing and what you guys did this past week! Cheers!

The Year’s End.

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Hello everyone! Sorry I’ve been gone for such a long time. I’ve just been so busy and I just got back from a retreat. Lately, I feel like I don’t know how to start my posts without an apology. I will work on that.

2015 is now officially over and 2016 is here to greet us. Honestly, it feels surreal. It hasn’t hit me yet that the year is done. It feels like it went by way too quickly. Even Christmas and Thanksgiving flew by like it never happened. It’s scary how fast time is flying. Today marks the first day of the new year. I’m sort of nervous but excited to see what it has in store for me. I think 2015 has been really hard. In fact, this year has been a year of real molding and testing for me. I’ve come to see and accept a lot of my struggles, mistakes, and failures. For a long time now, I’ve always gotten so frustrated with myself for messing up all the time. Something about me craved perfection–craved validation through my accomplishments. Little did I know that I was basically setting myself up to an unhealthy lifestyle. It became so refreshing and liberating once I accepted my faults and brokenness and laid them all down. It sounds like a basic fundamental and concept, but at times, I forget. I guess the biggest thing I learned this year is that life is short and the future is not guaranteed. So, treat every moment as if it’ll be my last, and treat every relational interaction as if it’ll be the last time I ever see them again. And the biggest thing I’m anticipating for 2016 is for me to enter into a season of truly being the best version of myself and living out my purpose in fullness. All in all, I’m truly grateful and blessed to have been alive through all of it and to still draw breath to this day.

What are some things you guys are looking forward to/expecting/anticipating for 2016?

December’s Musing.

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Hey guys!
I know I haven’t posted in a while. I’ve just been so busy lately, but I’m officially on winter break! It feels so good to relax until I go back for Spring semester. I’ve actually been finished with school since last week but haven’t gotten around posting until now.

To be quite honest, I’ve been very stressed and a bit depressed lately. Something I don’t like to mention about myself is that I experience episodes of depression often. I think I really want to just get away. I’m glad I’m doing a lot of traveling over the winter (which I will post about more later). I really want to just take some time away from my busy routines and responsibilities, but perhaps that means I’m just running away.

It’s really hard to deal with obstacles when they are self-made. I become the writer of my own suffering–where my pen of grief meets the fragile paper of my heart. Dramatic? Yeah, probably but it feels like that a lot of the times. Christmas is just around the corner, a holiday that I’ve always loved, yet joy and excitement is slow to greet me this time around.

I need to push through.

How are you guys doing? How’s December been going for all of you?

Photo Challenge: Eye Spy.

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I’ve never done a photo challenge before but thought it’d be fun to try. This week’s theme is “eye” and I didn’t really know what picture to use or capture. As I mulled over it, I came to choose this particular photo.

I chose this picture to illustrate that the “eye” is more than just the physical organ but also a spiritual lens that is used to see the unseen–where the subtle beauties of life become transparent to us. I hope you guys like it!
Eye Spy

New Horizons.

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“Man cannot discover new oceans unless he has the courage to lose sight of the shore.” –Andre Gide

Something that’s been resonating with me lately is the idea of home. They say home is a place of solace–a place of memories–where a piece of our soul is imbued to something meaningful. They also say you can build home where ever you like. I’ve been building a lot of things lately, but I don’t think home is one of them. This past year, as I’ve been blogging, going to school, attending church, investing time into my hobbies, etc., I feel as though I’ve lost my original purpose for everything. I’m at a place where I no longer know what I’m doing and why I’m doing them, but what I do know is that this life of mine must be made for more than this.

Sometimes, I just have to step back and take some time to look around. Every turn and every corner presents a life outside of mine–there’s something about this place–this place that is so full of inspiration. All I want is to be apart of it; to explore and uncover all things that are beautiful. More than anything, I want expand my horizons, see where I belong, and build home where ever I go. Thus, this is where I’ve arrived–to a place where for me, for now, is a journey to find me.

Breathe.

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Hey guys!

It’s been such a hectic week for me. I realized I’ve been starting all of my recent posts with this sort of introduction. I do apologize for sounding so downcast. Much like the past few weeks, I’ve been studying, studying, and yeah, more studying. Yet strangely, at the same time, I’ve also been consistently procrastinating. Wondering how they can work simultaneously? Yeah, me too.

This weekend, I took a much needed breather and went to the zoo! Thus explains all the pictures! I had tons of fun, relieved much stress, and got a lot off my chest. I also sort of want to make this post rather casual. Less talking, more visualizing. So, please enjoy!

Let me know in the comments below what you guys did over the weekend! It’s always a pleasure interacting with you all and getting to know everyone! Cheers!